Give Me Therapy
by IAmThePoisonedYouth
Summary: Billy has been struggling with his mental health. Can Teddy help him through it, or is he broken beyond repair? {Wickling}


Sometimes it felt like his entire world was on hold.

Those agonising, endless, relentless moments where his misery seemed to drag mercilessly on, making his already difficult to bear life harder to suffer through.

And the worst part?

He couldn't scream for help, drowning under his own thoughts, unable to breathe. He couldn't talk to anybody, he'd just bring them down too, make their lives as gloomy as his.

There were tiny moments where things started to look up, a flicker of colour in his grey world, giving him the smallest bit of hope. That hope came in the form of his doting boyfriend, a boy who he knew he didn't deserve, but still somehow had him, and that was the greatest form of serendipity he had ever encountered.

When he was alone, though, that hope faded and his universe once more drained to darkness, his thoughts telling him that he would be better off dead, that he was a monster, a freak.

And he was.

He was a mutant, but not just any mutant - the son of the Scarlet Witch, a woman who had caused the world so much grief that most of it hadn't forgiven her, some of her friends even had previously advocated to murder her for the sake of the human race.

Being her son made things a lot more complicated - he knew his powers were already potentially catastrophic and feared if he ever lost control. He saw the looks that some of the Avengers and the X-Men gave him - they feared him, what they could do.

And he dreaded the day his beloved would look at him with those same eyes.

To stem his thoughts for a while, he had resorted to reckless behaviours like cutting his wrists and legs, making sure to wear clothing that covered his whole body. To avoid his boyfriend from noticing, he distanced himself from any activities which may have lead to him finding out, desperate keep it all in.

Because God help him if he dragged Teddy down with him too.

"Billy?" Teddy's voice was gentle as he rested a hand on his boyfriend's shoulder, gently shaking him to grab his attention, "Billy, you listening?"

Billy snapped out of his thoughts, then turned his head, "Yeah… No. Sorry. I wasn't focused."

"I was asking you if you want to have a Star Wars marathon sometime soon?" Teddy then sighed, then whined bitterly, "What's wrong with you? You've been so far away lately."

Billy's heart jumped in panic at that, the prospect of his lack of concentration driving Teddy away too heartbreaking to bear and he babbled, "I… I'm sorry. I'll do better, I promise."

Teddy instantly regretted his words and cupped Billy's cheek, assuring, "It's alright. I know. I didn't mean to be so blunt."

"It's okay." Billy lied, then miserably buried his face in his knees.

Worried, Teddy rubbed his back and attempted to ask, "S-So… how have you been feeling lately? You've been quiet."

"I'm fine." the words poured out of Billy like poison, but he was so used to saying them that he was immune.

Teddy could tell he was being dishonest but didn't want to push him, terrified that if he did so, he'd just shove him off the edge. It broke his heart to see Billy like this, and he ached to to try and heal him but didn't know how to.

He huffed, then took a leap, "You're not fine."

"Yes." Billy said, shuffling away from him, "I am." 

Teddy could feel the beginnings of tears welling in his eyes, "Bee, please." he begged, "Don't do that. Don't push me away." 

Billy pushed himself to his feet and began to rant, "What do you expect me to say, Ted? That I'm struggling? That even just waking up in the morning is a challenge? That I spend most of the day wishing I was dead? You know, I wish I could be someone better, someone you deserve b-but I can't. I'm a fuck up. I know that an-and I just wish I could change." he felt the familiar blue lightning crackle up his arms and shoot into his eyes as he hissed the one spell he could never successfully cast, "IwishIwassomeonebetter."

"Bee… stop." Teddy pleaded, unable to stop the tears rolling down his cheeks as he watched his boyfriend spiral, the magical energy consuming him.

He stepped forward, pulling Billy close, ignoring the slight sting of magic as he held the other, despite his struggling in his arms. It took a few minutes for Billy to give up trying to escape and he slumped against Teddy's chest, sobbing, the energy being drawn back within himself.

"I-I'm sorry." he blurted out between heaving gasps for breath, his tears soaking Teddy's shirt.

Teddy rested his cheek against the top of his boyfriend's head, hushing him, "You can't help it. It's not your fault."

"Yes i-it is… It's all my fault…" Billy whimpered, "I'm a monster."

Teddy pulled away, cupping Wiccan's cheek and forcing him to look up at him, "No, you're not. You're not, okay? You're Billy Kaplan, my idiot boyfriend who I love and need very much. I love you, okay?"

Billy nodded and released a soft sob, compelling Teddy to pull him close once more, rocking him and hushing him, trying to offer him as much comfort as possible.

Some time passed, and the two were now lying on the bed, legs tangled together as Billy showed Teddy what he had been doing to himself.

"Th-This one was from after Cassie died…" he explained, voice trembling, "I… uh… waited for you to have a shower, then I did it. With a pencil sharpener blade."

Teddy traced the thin, pale scar with his thumb, his expression one of utter sadness, heartbroken that somebody could actually do this to themselves, his boyfriend nonetheless.

He wanted to protect Billy from the dangers of the world, but if that included his own mind, he wasn't sure of what to do. He could offer him to get help, but was terrified that he'd refuse and lose himself more. His worst nightmare was walking in one day and seeing Billy cast the most terrible spell ever.

'IwishIwasdead'.

He couldn't let that happen. Never.

Billy noticed the look on his boyfriend's face and looked down, "I know I shouldn't do this. I'm really truly sorry that I do."

"No." Teddy cupped his cheek and rested his forehead against his, "I understand. Just… we should probably get you help. I'll be with you every step of the way, don't you worry."

Surprisingly, Billy agreed, "Okay. I'll get help." 

"Good." Teddy smiled, thumb tracing the other's cheekbone affectionately, "But you have to promise me… no more cutting yourself. And you'll talk to me when you need it?"

Billy nodded, "I promise."

Teddy closed the distance between their mouths for a gentle, yet passionate kiss that seemed to last both forever and too short, and when they pulled away, they were both breathless.

"I love you." Teddy assured, searching the other's eyes.

Billy smiled, and it was the most beautiful thing Teddy had seen in ages, then he spoke, "I love you too."


End file.
